Shine Before All Men

By Tony Nguyen

“The light that shines farthest, shines brightest.” –C.T. Studd

I’ve never heard anyone say, “I grow the most in my comfort zone.” Never. I don’t believe I ever will nor do I believe that myself or anyone should desire to stay in our comfort zone forever. Why? Because it is guaranteed that we will face an opportunity to grow when out of it. It’s like the analogy of a fish out of water; a fish perhaps will never understand that it is wet and in water if it never leaves the water into the open air. Such is the same for us men if we are to never leave our routine circumstances or situations.

A few weeks ago the Lord had really convicted me to step out of my comfort zone and engage with people whom I normally don’t engage with. Through my work, I ended up sitting in on a lecture and the speaker was a transgender pastor. The pastor spoke about faith, gender, the blind hatred and antagonist forces LGBT men/women face, etc. Side note: If you want to know the kind of guy I am, I initially showed up because the hosts were serving chips and guac… Anywho, the point is that I realized I refuse to acknowledge people who I presuppose do not hold the same beliefs that I do. I realized that I am not inclined to give certain people the time of day and listen to their story because I think I’m right and they’re wrong and that means they are beneath me.

Man, am I a jerk.

Earlier that week the Fellows and I went to listen to the testimony of a couple involved in full time outreach ministry. This couple have spent much of their life running with crowds whom I assume most “typical” Christian people don’t hang around with; for them it’s been actors/actresses, artists, LGBT folk, BLM activists, etc. Through their testimony they challenged my co-Fellows and I to put ourselves in those uncomfortable situations. They encouraged us to live like Jesus did, how he dined with tax collectors and fellowshipped with prostitutes—people on the margins. Of course they weren’t encouraging us to ditch our beliefs in Christ and to pick up immoral lifestyles whatever the case may be, but they pointed out to me that if we don’t step out and engage our neighbor, we’re no better than the worst sinner. We’d be no better than the Essenes of Ancient Near East, an ancient group Israelites who thought it better to recede from society and be their own holy hamlet instead of engaging their neighbors and their corrupt brethren in faith.

With all this in mind I’m sure an array of emotions can be evoked, but I encourage you to bring to mind a sense of empathy and humility. This is not a call to drop all that we know of God’s goodness and let ourselves be swayed to and fro by the waves of the culture we live in. Instead, this is a call to let your light shine before men so that they will see your good deeds and glorify your Father who is in Heaven.

Hearken to His Voice

By Rachel Yowell

Oh, that today you would hearken to His voice! Psalm 95:7

I’m not sure why, but out of everything we’ve ever recited from the Common Book of Prayer, this line is what sticks out to me the most. For the life of me, I can’t remember Thanks be to God, alleluia! Alleluia! but I can remember this verse. Hearken to His voice. Oh, that today that is what you would do: hearken to His voice. Today. I think there is a part of my life that the Lord is using it to speak into.

Among numerous other thoughts, one that has been on my mind recently is why God doesn’t tell us clearly what He wants us to do, and what His will for us is. Why doesn’t He give us a blatant, obtrusive sign that tells us what to do with our lives, what direction to go, what His plan for us is. If I just knew, without a shadow of a doubt what exactly He wanted me to do and how and where, I’ll do it! Why isn’t it that clear? Why is it uncomfortable, and dare I say even frustrating at times? Freedom. I think that’s the answer – freedom. Freedom is what we all want (freedom to make decisions, freedom to be ourselves, etc.) The funny thing is, I think maybe too much freedom scares us. How dare God let us have the freedom to make choices! What a funny thought. If the answer was clear, cut and dry, I don’t think I would seek the Lord and His heart nearly as much as I would if I actually had to rely on Him and place my trust in Him. If a clear answer is what I’m seeking the most, I’ve missed the point completely, even if my intentions for knowing the answer are good. And because God loves us so and actually cares for us, He gives us the freedom to choose to love Him. He gave us the freedom to choose Him in every choice we make. I think God loves adventure. He is all about the journey. And that is exactly what this is. Making decisions about our future and discerning what the Lord’s will for our lives are takes us on a journey where we get to lean into the Lord, listen, and enjoy the ride. I think this adventure takes us deeper into the heart of God and discovering more about Him. It allows us to sit in His presence. What’s cool is that while I’m sitting here trying to figure out life, God already knows what is going to happen – He has known for a long time! I have missed the point because I have desired knowing the answer more than knowing God more deeply and desiring Him above all else. God wants us to enjoy Him and He wants us to enjoy the journey. One thing I know for sure is I am called to love people. There are times I don’t always feel like it, and there are plenty of times that I don’t do such a great job of it, but I know that nothing makes my heart beat faster, nothing draws me closer to Jesus than the thought of glorifying God through loving people. My question for next year is how and in what setting I will love people. While I get so caught up in asking what His will for my future is, I should hearken to His voice today, and ask what His will is for me today, right now. Oh, that today you would hearken to His voice! How sweet that is. I am taking these next few months to enjoy the journey with God. I’m thankful for the freedom to love Him and to fall more in love with Him along the journey.  

Rhythm of Rest

By Tressa Czysz

This year we are focusing on five main rhythms of life. By living in these rhythms this year, the goal is for them to become both habitual, and something that we see as beneficial as we grow and prepare for the many years to come. These five rhythms are: worship, prayer, work, study, and Sabbath. The first four I would say that I am relatively comfortable with -they are pretty straightforward and are pretty structured at least to the extent of where and when we meet and what the general expectations are. However, that last one is the one that I anticipate being the trickiest for this year. Something about growing up in a culture where there's always more to be done and where being busy is not only the norm, but gains you respect and communicates to others that you are important because of all the things you have to do and the places you have to be, makes it difficult to wrap my mind around leaving time aside in my schedule to do things that aren't necessarily "productive". I use quotes there because I recognize that taking time to intentionally rest, to pray and to play, is actually extremely healthy and helps us to be even more productive when we got back to work or whatever else is going on in our busy lives.

So with that in mind, I hope to learn what good rest looks like more and more as the weeks go by. Some weekends rest may be spending a few hours kayaking on the lake, some weekends rest may be reading books for fun, some weekends rest may be taking a trip to visit friends or family, or exploring someplace new. Resting will probably look a little bit different each weekend, but there will also be some recurring themes: getting outside to enjoy God's beautiful creation, spending time alone to recharge my introverted self in preparation for busy weeks, time with fellows and friends playing games, going places, or doing something that results in lots of laughter, and slowing down long enough to be reminded of my identity in Christ and that all that I do is done out of Salvation, not for Salvation. 


This idea of Sabbath and rest also ties in well with my one word prayer for the year: listen. I am waiting in expectation to see how God will teach me to better listen as I seek to find rest in him.  I think part of that overlap will come especially when I take time to reflect on the week and all that I have heard and learned in order to better absorb and better understand what God is saying to me and what he wants me to take away each week.

"Blawging"

Written by Tom Barker

Generally, I do not like the notion of blogging. I see it as attention seeking. Why should I expect people to want to read what I have to say about my mundane life as though I think I have wisdom other people need? Now, if you’re going on a big trip or doing a year-long Fellows Program and people want to hear about your adventures, that’s a reason. So, I’ll do it because you ask. Because I love you, mystery reader, except Winston. You know what you did.

After losing every single one of my marbles sitting around this summer waiting for something to happen, starting the Fellows Program was a refreshing, if jarring, breath of fresh air. When I am worn down I get bitter, when I get bitter I get angry, then suspicious, when all that happens I withdraw emotionally and grow cold and shy. I fully expected to feel very out-of-place in the Fellows Program. Because this is a self-fulfilling prophecy, that was the case, for about a day. Then I woke up and suddenly remembered: “Oh, right. I actually like people! I forgot.” After my epiphany, I quickly came to realize that every single person involved with the Fellows Program was an exceptionally likeable and kind person.

We spent much of the next week learning too much about ourselves, understanding our Myers-Briggs and our five big Strengths and Weaknesses. I’m an INFJ, which is apparently the rarest personality type. Shortly thereafter, we began our jobs. I work as a marketing intern for a non-profit organization called City 616. Their mission is to develop community and share God’s love with every person they can find, especially those who aren’t likely to find that anywhere else. I spent much of the first week worried about my own future and financial situation. It turns out adults seem to function as middlemen between those who pay them and those who need to be paid (like insurance companies and Fellows programs that require tuition in order to function). 

 Soon it was pointed out me that the question I needed to be asking working at a Christian ministry wasn’t “Am I going to be okay at the end of this year?” it was “What can I do to share God’s love this year?” I’m sure that would be more constructive than the self-centered alternative, maybe like writing a blog post because I think I’m cool versus doing it because other people care. Maybe I can do things for the right reason rather than selfishly, but only with help, preferably from an all-powerful deity named God.